Back to Your Purposes

So thankful for today and for the much needed peace and reset. As of lately, I have been consumed with anxiety-whether it be the feeling of failure with my parents’ salvation, inability to forgive and love my extended family because of past hurts, or even anxiety over death. The enemy has had a hold on me, but praise the Lord, the Holy Spirit led my reading and time with God and it was so sweet and so freeing. And it was the most random passage, so you know it can only be God. So it started with Psalm 84 where it talked about how blessed it is that God is our strength and that it is He who we trust in. But in verse 11, it was a promise I needed to hear “ no good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly”. It’s a promise I can believe and trust that even though my eyes can’t see and my heart doesn’t want to believe, the exact season and the exact moments that were formed for me ( Psalm 139) are the best good for me in this very second. That’s crazy right? Because God cannot contradict Himself. It is either He keeps His promises or breaks them. But just like in Numbers when He was talking to Balaam, “‘God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?’” (Num 23:19).

So this revelation actually came from the most random book, Judges Lol. You would think it would be from Joshua, be strong and courageous etc. but Nah Judges. So in judges there is this constant cycle of disobedience and then a cry for help from Israel, God comes in and delivers them and saves them. So it seems like this book has an overarching theme: when people forget who God is, they are prone to disobey and go, bow and serve aka worship other gods and idols. And then you see God’s mercy and grace woven in their wandering to bring them back to Himself. But what caught my eye was Judges 3:7-11 ( focus is v11). So the first deliverer is Othniel, Caleb’s younger brother. SO boom, the cycle happens, Othniel is now summoned and does his thing because V10 the Spirit of the Lord was upon him ( whoo the Holy Spirit enters the picture) and then he wins battles and then and then.. V11 “ so the land was at rest for 40 years. Then Othniel the son of Kenaz dies”. I was like wow… what a note to leave off on. But what is so cool that the Holy Spirit highlighted was this, isn’t this how everyone’s life sounds. Like P. Ray always says, the great equalizer between rich and poor, well-achieved and not, is this: death. But what caught my eye was this: Othniel served in God’s short, yet significant purpose. Although he gets like what, 4 verses in the bible? His purpose was to not only rescue the Israelites who then again disobey in the next after his death, so was his “purpose” meaningless? I’d argue no because Othniel is an instrument that displays God’s unwavering faithfulness and patience towards Israel AND was the verse that brought me back to purpose. In the midst of all my desires, even godly ones like my parent’s salvation, how easy it was for me to pervert things that should be ABOUT God and make them ABOVE God. But it’s so crazy how such a random verse reminded me that ;like Othniel, our lives are used for God’s purposes and His purpose alone. It’s okay to enjoy the gifts God has given us and the hard and easy seasons, but ultimately I needed to be reminded of surrendering my life to God once again. It’s so easy for me to get caught up in the details and in the watering and illusion I can grow plants ( Mark 4:26-29), control how things should go, or even make my purpose of life one of fear or placing my own expectations. But like everywhere in the bible, it is just a constant reminder that it’s easy to get caught up in civilian affairs, but God wants us to constantly take a step back and look at the big picture. It’s about Him. It’s all about Him- who He is, what He has done, and what He is doing even in the midst of uncertainty, waiting, trials, and joys. Don’t miss it, it is all about Him.

Prayer:

My life is yours, O Lord. So I entrust to you each day, believing that all things within it are guided by the sound of your voice. None of your purposes are void or lacking good. For you cannot contradict your own goodness, all of it is good. All of who you are is holy and good. Bring me back to the heart of worship where it is all about you. I surrender control, I surrender my hopes, my desires, my dreams, for you are my strength and my portion. You are enough, let me heart know that you are enough.