The Chosen and Therapy (July 2024)

Recently I have been binging The Chosen -I know I am a little late. But I think watching this show and reflecting on some of the stuff from therapy lately has grown into another blog post. Today I am at home with COVID, yes sir, it is still around- but I decided to take myself out for a date to Santa Monica beach. I have to admit, I wasn’t sure what to expect, I just knew I was intentionally wanting to connect with God and see what happened- Lord worked, I’ll tell you that. 

TLDR (too long didn’t read): God’s word is true. When it comes alive, it’s a unique and real experience- the words jumping off the Bible and piercing the heart. I finally understand what Jesus means when He speaks in Matthew - loving God and loving others and this call to love others as yourself. What I realized in my time at the beach and through therapy, I think a lot of the times we know what we need to do and what we want to do, but often our inability to know ourselves (like really dive deep) and know God’s character in relation to ourselves, we won’t be able to meet the mark we want or hope. Our inability to know ourselves through the lens of God, keeps us at bay from loving others well, deeply, and compassionately. 

Alright shall we...... Let’s see if the Spirit can connect all these thoughts in a cohesive way. 

 Part 1: We’ll start with therapy: 

Yesterday’s session.... First, maybe not first, but quite often, my therapist (Jaslyn-if you want more info, I would highly recommend  her any day. I am not paid for this haha) Okay back to it, often times when speaking about something present or past, she pauses me (I reluctantly follow), and asks what I am feeling in my body- we call this, a body scan. And what I appreciate is this emphasis of being with the emotion, bringing the Lord in, and just sitting with whatever tension, space, emotion, picture, color that comes up. And then she challenges me to say (out loud if I may add), something along the lines of “I am here with you, whatever may come up, I’m not leaving you” etc. Honestly, this was super uncomfortable, had no idea what was going on, and was low key skeptical, but I trust her, trust God, and at this point, understanding everything hasn’t really gotten me the peace and rest I’ve longed for. So I concurred. Surprisingly my body relaxed, saying things out loud became more comfortable still hesitant but comfortable, and realized these were the few times, I let my body tell me what I needed more than trying to logically rationalize my emotions. 

Some may argue, why not just go to the word and in prayer? I would say yes, do so, but I think there has to be a deeper purpose than just doing "the right thing". But it's challenging our deepest needs, hurts, pains that may not completely believe the gospel in the same way our minds think. It's learning to link the gospel between what we know to be true and what we want to believe in our hearts as true. Some may ask if this is biblical- I would love to share that it is if it’s given a biblical framework that is already clear, but also unclear. I feel like the bible has a way of doing that- like Jesus speaking in parables: clear but at the same time unclear and I think it is because it gives room for the Spirit to work in us and through us. 

Part 2: The chosen: 

I am totally in love with this show, it does a great job of sticking to the Bible but also integrates creative freedom. As one speaker at a women’s retreat said, give limits where the Bible gives limits and give freedom where the Bible gives freedom. One character that really stands out to me and I am for sure most like is Simon Peter. The leader, yet complicated. Someone with good intentions, but unknowingly so angry, passionate, maybe a little stuck in his ways at times, but eventually learns lol  But the interesting theme in this show that I really appreciate is their ability to convey the disciples struggle of wanting to know and understand, having the knowledge at hand but not completely grasping it. They had to ask questions to Jesus and even questions about themselves in regards to what Jesus was teaching that really went against their grain of who they were, who they thought they would be as Israel’s chosen people, and grappling how Jesus was turning their world upside down and all around them. But it’s in that where faith becomes highlighted- you can take Hebrews 11 or even all of the 2nd half of Hebrews that highlights what faith is- what is hoped for but not seen. And the second theme I have seen is conflict and how Jesus intentionally brings people who are quite opposite together in different missions or tasks. Personally, I have had this theme often done- if I see a clique or a person I don’t trust or want to get to know, Jesus puts me in the same small group or same ministry and forces me to sit in the same circle. The question is why? And it’s so clear in the chosen episodes, being in the same space and same place forces you to get to know someone and see that they really aren’t much different- from the surface yes, but the depth and the need for a savior, no. 

Part 3: Bringing it together:  

If you made it this far.. nice job... hopefully I can tie it all in. So how does therapy and taking a pause to understand what your body’s need go hand in hand with the chosen? Here it is: The depth in which you know yourself and your needs and what your negative emotions communicate and be able to bring God into the picture (aka applying knowledge), it will allow you to live out the way God calls us to live- in complete dependence on Him for everything. This dependency will somehow grow a compassion to see others in the same way, not in a demeaning way, but in a vulnerable likeness and thus may give us the ability to see how God sees them and love them the way God calls us to. There is a humility of understanding our weakness and God as our strength to love others well. (Eph 2:1-10).  

I don’t think just reading and praying will bring you to a fruitful life to love others well. More often than not, I think we are trying to exchange the fruit we see when in reality, fruit is just the byproduct of what is being grown from the seeds and roots. Through therapy, I’ve gained a clearer understanding of what my negative emotions are telling me (thoughts/ body scans/ etc), it’s a communicating a need that has yet to be met or wasn’t met in the past and is somehow trying to tell me that. Pause- selah. This is where you can tap into God’s word and prayer and tap into something beyond knowledge and understanding- I don’t understand what I need, so let me pause and ask God and see. Often times, it’s not always clear right away, but sometimes you don’t need an answer, sometimes you just need to be with the negative thoughts/ emotions- similar to how God is with us. And I wonder if that’s what true healing is. Often times we think of sin as doing evil, but I would argue the effects of sin is much deeper than just doing evil deeds. It has also tainted our world with pain and suffering as Jesus and other apostles allude to as well. What am I getting to? I think if you don’t know and understand your wounds and bring God into the healing process of being seen, known, heard in whatever capacity, we won’t be able to do that for others. I think how we relate to God in our pain and sin and whatever we lack is a good indicator of how we will respond to people in their need, sin, and pain. We may want to be better or do better, but unless the vertical is addressed, the horizontal can’t be completely transformed.

In Matthew 7, it commands us the golden rule, which even non Christians enjoy “so whatever you wish that other would do to you, do also to them”, and yeah I’m sure to a certain extent we can produce a level of devotion. But when it comes to genuinely loving people for the sake of Christ more than ourselves, how does one do that? I think it comes from truly understanding who we are, our upbringing and how it relates to what we need, finding and asking God to fill those needs. And it’s from that place that I think God could open our eyes to learn that yeah people are difficult, but they are also probably hurt and in pain and in some way trying to grapple with an unmet need. Ultimately, everyone needs Jesus in the fullest capacity, but knowing  how and where is the question. And then bringing that hope and light to others in compassion- I truly believe that’s what gives us the power to forgive, to put others before ourselves, and live a life in humility and servanthood to God and to others as God has intended in his word.